Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Handling Disappointment and Bad Days

One of the blogs I love and one of the women who are my mentors from afar is Kimberly Wilson. You can see her blog here.

This year, she started a great idea where she has guest bloggers regulary contributing to her blog. While perusing it today, I read with much head nodding, a post by one of her guest bloggers Samara O'Shea. It was exactly what I wanted to say in a draft post I had saved previously. This paragraph was the trigger for the head nodding:
'I call my new ideas boomerangs, and it's my job (your job) to keep throwing them out into the Universe. Every resume, essay, poem, book proposal, blog, small business plan etc. is a boomerang. Throw them out there again and again. Some will get lost and others will come back to you when you least expect it. In 2010, boomerangs that I threw out in 2007 have come flying back at me. 2010 wouldn't feel this good if it weren't for 2009—the year of nothing going my way. And I'm sure there are other set backs ahead, but I need those road blocks to fully appreciate when I do get what I worked for (and more).'
She also said that, ' I had figured out how to field failure, and having a plan for failure is as important as having a plan for success.' From personal experience, I have realised the importance of this and I touched on it a little in yesterday's post Julie & Julia.

Things happen that can disappoint, you can feel rejected, barriers seem to be everywhere and it will feel horrible. A heartache, a bad feeling in your gut, physical effects of disappointment through your body. Fortunately these are only temporary! And it is up to you to find the way out of this situation.

Create a 'plan for failure'. Expect the best but be prepared for the worst. Understand that things happen, and this 'bad' thing may be a blessing in disguise because something better is around the corner. Or it is a wake up call to improve your game.

What can you do to overcome this 'failure'?
  • Speak with your friends - a problem shared and all that - good girl friends have a knack of making you feel better!
  • Look at your perspective - can you put this event in its place in the bigger picture? Look at the possibility that this may actually be a good thing because you're not ready or because something better might be coming along?
  • Throw yourself into an activity you enjoy - be it cooking, planning, running - to remind yourself of the good things that exist in your life
  • Look at what created the disappointment and improve it. Can you make it better for the next submission, or is it still really good and it was just the wrong person to show it to or discuss it with?
  • Take the time to connect back to yourself and see what is important to you in life.
  • Listen to some feel good music to lift up your mood. Check out Phoenix - my current fave!
Make it what you wish SSSs!

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